I have been asking of myself what is the purpose of eternity? I cannot be sure what to think of it, because the concept just feels to me unfathomable.

But one thing I know, when I ponder heaven, is how much I desire to free of myself.  I want so much to be free of my selfishness. I wish I could go on without such constant struggle.

The idea of my being ceasing with my breathing makes sense to me. I don't see eternity written into creation. But then I wonder how I will ever come to the end of myself without actually ending. Could it be that as long as I am subject to entropy I will have death worked into me? Could it be that the only way to be fully composed of only life, and good, and love is to exist but outside of this evil, evil place?

"To leave this poor sick body there, and to fly to a world ten thousand times brighter, more beautiful than this"